


Love

by Whymsical



Series: in this universe and the next [12]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Chubby!America, Established Relationship, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Weight Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-02-16
Packaged: 2021-02-19 13:14:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22745080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whymsical/pseuds/Whymsical
Summary: Alfred isn't the thinnest person ever, and he knows it. One night, his thoughts turn darker than usual and Arthur has to show him that his weight and body type don't matter in how much he loves his silly American.
Relationships: America/England (Hetalia)
Series: in this universe and the next [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1175639
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	Love

**Author's Note:**

> 15/02/2020- I'm splitting up the collection this was a part of for ease of access and tagging of each story.

Alfred could usually ignore the slight stares people gave him. They didn't whisper or anything, but they stared and that was enough. Normally Alfred just immersed himself in his music or whichever comic book he was reading at the time, but it was worse on the days they had a slotted day in the weight room. The slots went by apartment blocks, and the blond American both looked forward to those days and dreaded them.

Sure, he was strong and worked out enough, but... There was a small-ish layer of chub around his stomach and thighs that was just there, and if it minimized at all by his workouts, it was an almost unnoticeable change. And in the weight room, when he wore shorts and a t-shirt, it was more noticeable. It didn't help that the other guys who used the room were all ripped, and on those days his self esteem really took a hit. They glanced at him _just_ a bit more, and gave him a _little_ more space than was necessary in the locker room- he had the whole row to himself- and try as he might not to dwell on the little poisonous thoughts in the back of his mind, some of them managed to slip through.

He had their small campus apartment to himself for now, as his roommate/boyfriend Arthur was still at classes and wouldn't be back for another half an hour at least. Arthur had a nice body, he thought as he just grabbed a pear and took it to his bed. He wasn't hungry much for anything else at the moment anyway. The Englishman was thin and small- well, smaller than Alfred- and he had nicely defined muscles. Especially in his nether regions. Sometimes, during his low points, Alfred still couldn't quite believe they were together, because surely Arthur could easily find himself a better and thinner person.

Half an hour later Alfred was curled up under his sheets, headphones over his ears, the pear sitting untouched on the nightstand next to him.

Arthur meanwhile sighed as he walked back to his dorm after yet another exhausting lesson. Walking into the dim room, he surveyed the area. "Alfred? I'm back."

Having heard the door close through his music, Alfred pulled out one of the headphones. "Hey there. How was it?" he asked, his voice just a tiny bit less emotion-filled than usual.

"All right, I suppose. A little tiring." The green eyed man scrutinized Alfred, setting down his bag and his camera as he sat on the end of his bed. "You?"

"Was all right." Alfred rolled over to face him, pulling the covers up a bit higher. He gave Arthur a small grin and shut his iPod off completely.

Arthur replied with a slight smile, tilting his head to look at his boyfriend. "That's good."

"Yeah!" Alfred gave a slightly off-sounding laugh and wriggled a bit beneath the covers. "So, are ya hungry or something?"

Letting out a small huff, Arthur raised an eyebrow at the man. "Yeah, pretty hungry..."

"All right, I can make you something!" Alfred got up and moved quickly to the kitchen. "Whatcha want?

"Anything is fine, really." He sighed, before leaning back and looking at Alfred. "As long as it's not any of your unhealthy crap."

Alfred flinched almost unnoticeably, before forcing a grin. "It ain't all unhealthy," he muttered, and moved to the kitchen. "How's fried rice?"

"That sounds good." Arthur swung his legs onto his bed, propping himself up against the headboard to read his newest book.

Nodding and getting out the necessary ingredients, Alfred set about preparing the rice. It took him about five minutes, and while he was serving he took a few bites, but otherwise took the rest of it to Arthur. It was in a large green and blue bowl, with a fork for him to eat it.

"Here ya go!" he said, placing the bowl onto Arthur's nightstand.

Arthur looked up from _Silence of the Lambs_ , before quickly bookmarking his page and sitting up straight to eat. After a couple of forkfuls, he cast his eye over Alfred. "...Are you not having any?"

"Not hungry..."

The Junior furrowed his brow at the man. "All right..."

"Yeah!" Alfred gave him another forced grin and retreated back to his bed, burrowing under the covers again.

His eyes following Alfred to his bed, Arthur noticed a uneaten pear on his bedside table. That really was odd... "Alfred?" he said tentatively. "Are you feeling all right?"

"H-Huh?" Alfred jumped a bit. "Yeah, I'm fine!"

Arthur jumped a little, taking a small step back. "Are you sure?" He steadily approached Alfred, pressing a hand to his forehead. "You don't have a temperature..."

"Yeah, I'm fine," Alfred repeated in a lower tone. "No need to worry!"

Humming suspiciously, Arthur drew back slightly. "If you insist..."

"Mhm!" Alfred nodded vigorously and wriggled a tiny bit away from him.

Noticing this, the older man stepped back further and sat back down on the edge of his bed. "Did... Did you want to sleep? I can give you some peace and quiet if you want..."

Alfred quickly sat up. "What? No, I'm fine." He smiled and suddenly got up to go over and take the bowl. "Here, I can wash that..."

"Ah, okay..." Arthur blinked a little out of his musing.

Alfred took it from him and washed it. When he glanced back at Arthur, the Englishman had stretched out again and was reading. His eyes slipped to Arthur's body and he stared wistfully at it.

Turning the page, Arthur caught Alfred's eye and smiled, adding a raised eyebrow to go with it.

Alfred jerked back a bit and turned his face away, looking ashamed. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"What?" Arthur frowned at the other. "What for?"

"Starin'..."

"You don't have to be." Arthur put his book down and went to stand in front of Alfred, gently taking the other's wrist in his hand. "We've been together almost eight months, you know I don't mind."

"I know," Alfred mumbled, looking away from him.

Leaning more towards Alfred, Arthur took his chin in his own hand and brought Alfred's face towards him, locking eyes with the man. "Alfred, what's wrong?"

"N-Nothing." Alfred moved back a bit.

Arthur softly pulled Alfred's wrist towards him. "Come on, what is it? I don't believe 'nothing' for a second."

"It's nothing, not important." Alfred pulled away again.

"Fine, I won't pressure you." Arthur loosened his grip, but still held his hand there. "But I still hope you'd tell me... Well, just know you can tell me anything you need to, anyway. I'm here for you, after all."

"I-I..." Alfred looked steadfastly at the ground. "Why'd ya want me when you can have someone better?" _Someone skinnier..._

Arthur blinked, his eyes widening slightly as he stared at Alfred, before sighing softly and stroking the other's cheek. "Alfred... I don't see anyone better. It's you that I like, so it's you that's best."

"B-But look at me." Alfred sniffed and bit his lip harshly to keep his emotions in check. He twisted his body slightly away from Arthur. "You could get someone...else," he mumbled.

"Well, I don't want someone else," Arthur said simply, furrowing his brows, ducking to look at Alfred better. "What exactly is wrong with you?"

Alfred gestured vaguely at his stomach and thighs.

Giving Alfred a once-over, Arthur then cupped his lover's face, locking green eyes onto blue. "Alfred... I still don't see anything wrong with you."

Eyes shut now and flinching slightly, Alfred guided Arthur's hand down to pinch at the layer of chub. "That..." he managed to get out.

Arthur's eyes saddened and he leaned forwards to give Alfred a kiss to the cheek, resting a hand on his shoulder. "'That' doesn't matter."

"But it does," Alfred whispered, though he ever so slightly leaned into him.

"Why?" Arthur pulled back slightly to rest their foreheads together. "How good you are or how wonderful you are or how damn perfect you are isn't measured by your body. And I think you're all three."

A lone tear slipped down Alfred's cheek from beneath his closed lids. "B-But..."

"But what?" The older man ran a hand down Alfred's cheek before slipping his arms around the other's waist. "What matters is for you to feel comfortable with yourself, Alfred. Not whether you're a size 4 or not."

Alfred wrapped his arms around Arthur in return and buried his nose into the Englishman's neck, shoulders shaking a little bit. "Matters t'me what you think..."

"Well I think you're beautiful," Arthur murmured back, laying a gentle kiss on the other's hair.

Alfred whimpered a bit, hugging him tighter.

"What? Don't you believe me?"

After a moment's hesitation, Alfred gave the very slightest shake of his head. "N-Not completely..."

Giving Alfred a sigh and a slight squeeze, Arthur stepped away, thinking for a moment as he retook Alfred's hand. "Come on, I'll prove it to you," he said, leading Alfred to the bathroom.

"W-What are you doing?"

"We're taking a bath."

"What?" Alfred stopped in his tracks. "You don't gotta, Artie, really."

"Come on." Arthur tugged Alfred's hand encouragingly. "I want to," he said in a softer tone.

"A-All right." Alfred moved forward again. He could never refuse his Arthur anything. His other hand reached up to quickly wipe at his eyes and to dry them.

Giving the man a soft smile, Arthur walked them into the bathroom and started to draw a bath, adding some soap to the water. Alfred meanwhile sat down meekly on the toilet seat, watching him from beneath the fringe of his hair. Once the bath had run, Arthur turned to him, holding out his hand to pull the other up. Alfred took it and stood, flinging his arms around the other to hug him tightly.

Reactions delayed in surprise, Arthur chuckled and held Alfred in return. "Come on, we can't get into the bath clothed."

"Guess not..." Alfred unbuttoned the Englishman's shirt and lightly slipped it off his shoulders.

Glancing down at Alfred's hands for a moment, Arthur pulled on the hem of Alfred's sweatshirt, tugging him closer. "Hey, you too," he said warmly.

But Alfred's fingers faltered and he jerked back, shaking his head quickly.

Arthur followed him a step, gently taking hold of his arm and lifting it towards himself. "Hey, it's all right."

Alfred shut his eyes and hesitated for a moment, but then took a step forwards and nodded. "Okay," he said in a quiet tone.

A smile twitched at Arthur's mouth, and he softly reached for Alfred's hoodie, pulling it up. "Arms up." he instructed as he lifted it up.

Obediently lifting his arms for him, Alfred snuffled a bit when the piece of clothing went up and over his head, catching on his nose for a moment. When it was gone he blinked owlishly and patted his hair down. He gave Arthur a small, hesitant smile.

Arthur grinned warmly back, encouraging the other. Taking hold of the hem of his t-shirt, Arthur gave him a questioning look.

"Yeah..." Alfred nodded again and quickly stripped Arthur of his shirt altogether.

Softly, Arthur leaned down and lifted the other's tee, kissing his stomach as he did so. As he lifted the shirt up, he laid gentle pecks upon the other's torso.

Whimpering softly, Alfred felt more tears dripping down his cheeks. "Y-You don't gotta do that..."

"I want to," Arthur murmured as he reached Alfred's lips, and he pressed a slightly firmer kiss upon them before pulling the shirt over Alfred's head.

Alfred kissed back eagerly, wrapping his arms around Arthur's neck. Smiling to Alfred's lips, Arthur held his hands at the other's hips, pulling him just that bit closer. Pulling away, Alfred nuzzled to his neck, his hands moving down to Arthur's pants, fingers expertly undoing the button and opening the zipper.

Arthur chuckled, lifting a hand to Alfred's hair, still running the other along his side.

Sighing happily, Alfred leaned into his touch and swiftly pulled his pants and boxers down. "You're uhh...you're gonna have to step outta them," he mumbled.

"I got that much," Arthur replied with a nuzzle to the blond hair, kicking his pants out of the way as he ran his fingers along the waistband of Alfred's, coming to rest at his zipper.

Alfred stilled for a split second, but then nodded against him, moving as close to Arthur as was possible.

Arthur gave the other a comforting kiss to the neck, undoing and slipping down his pants and underpants.

Letting out a small whine at the kiss, Alfred moved back once he was undressed. "Sh-Should I get in first?" he asked, turning his body away from Arthur.

"If you want to," Arthur replied, moving closer behind Alfred and laying a soft kiss on his shoulder.

"Yeah..." Alfred tilted his head back so it brushed against Arthur's for a brief moment before he stepped carefully into the tub, trying not to pay attention to how much the water level rose. He played around with the bubbles for a few moments and once he was settled he held a hand out to Arthur.

Smiling at his antics, Arthur gladly took it and stepped in with Alfred, slowly sitting in front of the other man.

Alfred's eyes were trained on Arthur's body the whole time, and he lifted his other hand to run his fingers down the curve of Arthur's shoulders all the way past his ribs and down to his hips.

Looking back at Alfred, Arthur flashed him a soft smile and left a few kisses on the hand he was holding. "Where's your sponge?" he murmured to the other afterwards.

Alfred shook his head and pulled Arthur closer to him between his legs, making sure to pile the bubbles around them in such a way that they hid most of his form from view. "Can we relax first?" he asked softly. "It's nice and warm..."

Arthur, a little startled by he motion, relaxed with a somewhat sheepish face. "Ah, of course."

"Thanks..." Alfred rested his chin on Arthur's shoulders. He gently pulled his hand out of Arthur's so both of his arms could go around his boyfriend's waist, and he absentmindedly traced the other's muscles with his fingertips, a very faint sigh working its way out of his mouth.

Feeling the breath flutter on his skin, Arthur wrapped his own arms around the other, hands resting on his back as Arthur turned his head to leave small pecks on his lover's skin. "This is nice." He hummed softly.

"You're nice," Alfred mumbled in return, though his lips curved up at the kisses. His arms tightened around Arthur's body.

"Heh. Well I'm not the only one," Arthur replied as he smoothed his hands along the other's back. The man closed his eyes lightly, drawing his fingers down Alfred's spine fondly.

"Thanks, Artie..." Alfred shivered a bit at the touch. If Arthur's hands wandered off to the sides, he'd be able to pinch the chub between his fingers. He wriggled around a bit so the bubbles closed around his body more.

"Hm?" Arthur drew back a little to look at Alfred. "What is it?"

"No, nothing." Alfred gave him a hesitant smile.

Arthur's face softened and he let out a small sigh, kissing the man on the cheek. He drew his hands up and to Alfred's shoulders, taking in his frame. "You know, you're very handsome."

Colour rose to Alfred's cheeks and he ducked his head before bumping it very lightly against Arthur's cheek. "You too."

Chuckling, Arthur also turned just a shade darker. "Well, I suppose, but not as much as you." He nudged the other a little, giving him a soft smile.

"Awh, stoppit Artie." Alfred let out a very tiny squeak of happiness and nuzzled to him a bit more. A moment later he leaned back, pulling Arthur along with him so the Englishman ended up lying on his soft squishy stomach.

Arthur's laugh grew lighter as he was pulled back, and he gave a smooch to Alfred's nose.

"What?" Alfred wrinkled his nose and then kissed Arthur's eyebrows in return. "Why're ya laughing?"

"Because I'm happy, why do you think?" Arthur poked Alfred's arm, raising a bushy brow at the man.

Alfred smiled broadly at this, his first big, real smile of the evening. "I'm happy too..." he said. After a moment he picked up his sponge and dunked it in the water before squeezing it out above Arthur's head.

Arthur's expression grew warm and he rested his head on his hands, only to yelp slightly as the sudden trickle of water came down on him.

Chuckling, Alfred wiped some water away with his thumb before it could get into Arthur's eyes. "I'm gonna wash you now, kay?" He grabbed the shower gel and squirted a fair amount onto the sponge before running it around Arthur's body, creating foamy designs on his skin.

"All right." Arthur hummed gently at the feeling, leaning slightly into it as the suds built up.

Alfred quickly but thoroughly cleaned him, using the showerhead to rinse the water off. When that was done he stuck his nose to Arthur's skin and breathed in deeply. "Mmm, you smell nice. Like me!" He loved the scent of his body wash, and it smelled heavenly on Arthur.

"Heh, thanks to you." Arthur smiled softly, taking hold of the sponge in Alfred's hand. "Shall I do you now?"

"Yeah..." Alfred somewhat reluctantly took away his protective screen- at least that's how he saw it- by pushing the bubbles away from his body. "Go ahead."

Once he had loaded the sponge, Arthur gently washed it over Alfred's skin, watching the suds and water run across his skin.

"What is it?" Alfred asked, in turn watching Arthur.

Arthur startled slightly, feeling a little foolish. "I just like watching it," he admitted with a bashful smile.

Alfred grinned at him. "Nothin' to be ashamed of."

"Not ashamed," the other man said, leaning forward to leave a kiss on Alfred's skin. "Just embarrassed."

"No need for that either." Alfred smiled at the kiss and pressed one to Arthur's forehead in return. So far Arthur had only done his shoulders and neck, but now he was starting to go lower. Alfred pursed his lips and unconsciously sucked in his stomach a little bit. Arthur had said he didn't mind, but wouldn't he like less of the chub?

As Arthur ran the suds down Alfred's torso, he continued pressing kisses to the other's skin.

"H-Hey..." Alfred gently lifted his face away. "You'll get soap in your mouth."

"Mmm, not that much," Arthur replied, smiling up at Alfred. "Besides, it's worth it."

"W-Worth it?" Alfred asked, his voice a bit squeaky from surprise. His eyes narrowed a bit suddenly and he dabbed a clump of foam from the corner of Arthur's mouth. "See?" he asked, mock-sternly, as he waved the soapy finger in front of Arthur's eyes. "It's bad for you if you swallow."

"You know I prefer to swallow," Arthur replied with a shadow of a smirk, resting his chin on his boyfriend's chest.

Alfred snorted, chuckling before turning red. "Y-Yeah, but not this stuff!"

Arthur's smirk grew wider at the man's reaction. "As I said," he murmured, defiantly pressing another kiss to Alfred's ribs. It's worth it."

"Yer too sweet..." Alfred muttered.

With closed eyes, Arthur hummed against Alfred's skin. "Not at all, just honest," he replied, eyes flicking up to Alfred.

"Well, sweet too." Alfred hugged him, feeling Arthur's arms press into his soft stomach. "I can finish..." The poisonous little thoughts came back. _He's just distracting you._ they hissed. _Stalling for time so he doesn't have to touch your fatness. He's only saying he doesn't mind because that's what you want to hear._ The American tried to ignore them, but his eyes dimmed a minute amount as he reached for the sponge. "Here, give me that..."

"What?" Arthur looked up at Alfred, a frown forming on his face. "No, it's all right, Alfred. I like doing this..."

"You don't gotta though." Alfred eased the sponge from him and dunked it down, scrubbing harsher than was necessary against his belly.

"Alfred!" Gently grabbing the other's wrist, Arthur tilted Alfred's head up to look into his eyes. "I want to."

"Okay." Alfred met his gaze for a few moments before looking down and relinquishing his hold on the sponge. "M'sorry," he said softly.

"Don't be." Arthur ducked down to meet Alfred's eyes again as he retrieved the sponge. "Alfred... I just... I-I like to touch you, okay?" he said, face flushing slightly.

Alfred's eyes widened a bit. "You do?"

"Well...yes."

"Oh." Slowly, Alfred guided Arthur's hand to his stomach. "...Even here?"

Arthur smiled softy. "Everywhere."

A tiny smile came to Alfred's face. "You mean it? Really really mean it?"

"Of course." Arthur leant down and gave the other's stomach a reassuring kiss. "Everywhere."

The smile grew as Alfred pulled Arthur up to hug the Englishman tightly to his chest. "Could I sleep with you tonight?" he asked in a whisper.

Holding the other in return, Arthur's own grin became serene. "Of course. You didn't even need to ask."

"Well hurry up then!" Alfred playfully whined into his ear. It was much easier to ignore the thoughts now, and just focus on Arthur. "The water's gonna get cold!"

Arthur just chuckled. "All right, all right... Although I can't do anything while I'm in your arms you know."

"Hmph. Well I wouldn't say ya couldn't do _anything_..." Alfred let him go though.

"Well, I can't wash you, anyway." Arthur replied, pecking Alfred's nose before returning to washing the man.

"Heh." Alfred sat still while Arthur washed him. When he was nice and clean, he reached over and unplugged the tub. "C'mon, bed now!" He rose and then picked Arthur up, waiting a moment for most of the water droplets to fall off them before stepping out.

Gasping a little as he was picked up, Arthur quickly gripped to Alfred before relaxing. "Sounds good."

Alfred nuzzled to him for a moment before setting him down and draping a towel over him. He speedily dried and dressed the both of them before picking him up again and carrying to bed. On the way, his eyes passed over Arthur's camera, and he paused for a moment. "Did ya get any cool shots today?"

"Hmm... I did, but, not the one I wanted." Arthur gave Alfred a warm smile, thinking about his collection and hoping to add a new photograph to it soon.

"Oh?" Alfred set him down. "What was the one you wanted?"

"Hmm..." Arthur hummed, pulling Alfred down with him, giving him a peck on the nose along the way as he picked up his camera. "That's a secret."

Alfred gave a soft smile at the peck, but it faded away at the camera. "Artie, what are you doing?"

"I just want to take some pictures!" Arthur replied innocently.

"Oh, okay... Want me to set anything up for you?"

"No," Arthur instructed, a fond smile on his face. "Just be natural." He snapped a quick picture on impulse, before Alfred had a chance to ready himself.

"Wh- Arthur!" Alfred made a leap for Arthur's bed, burrowing under the covers.

Chuckling, Arthur made his way over and lifted the top of the cover up, taking another photo of the ball underneath. "What?"

"Now?" Alfred stared up at him with puppy eyes. "Why?"

Arthur looked at the other tenderly. "I just want to take some pictures of you."

"B-But now?" Alfred chewed on his lip a little bit. "All right...but only if there's one of you an' me. And not too many, kay? I wanna cuddle and sleep."

"All right, all right," Arthur replied with a small laugh. "Just a couple, then."

"Well, come here then." Alfred uncurled a bit and held out a hand to him.

Taking the other's hand, Arthur shuffled up and lifted the camera to take a shot.

In the instant before the shutter clicked, Alfred tilted his head to the side and pressed a kiss to Arthur's cheek.

Arthur blinked, his eyes widening slightly. "A-Alfred!"

"Did ya take it, did ya take it?!" Alfred asked, peering at the camera.

"Yes..." Arthur clicked to display the picture, revealing him looking somewhat flushed but also pleased.

"Aww, you look so cute, Artie!" Alfred nuzzled to him and pressed another kiss to that same spot.

"Hmph. Well you do too," Arthur replied, snuggling closer to Alfred and lowering the camera. He thought about the pictures he took today and the stash of photographs he kept hidden of his boyfriend - a new one each day. How did he ever think he wasn't beautiful? Glancing at the camera, the Englishman smiled gently.

That was one for the collection.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos are love, comments are life ^0^


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